Overview
Thinking of restating the well known thesis that this game is the equivilant of baby brain soup but with more words than enough to fit in a sentence? Or, what if you want you have the desire to make yourself like an ultimate prankster by telling people that this game is good even though the screenshots and title clearly indicate otherwise? Then this guide is for you!
Making a joke review
Making a joke review for Bad Rats is so easy, even a dead catipillar who’s possessing people for revenge could do it in it’s… sleep? I don’t know if you can be dead and asleep at the same time. Is that possible? Please, respond to this with a well-thought out college essay on this topic, your professor is emailing me non-stop for this. Anyways, moving away from the fact that my obviously try-hard absurdist “humor” isn’t exactly funny, making a joke review for Bad Rats is incredibly easy. To do so, you’ll need:
1) A copy of Bad Rats that you’ve “played” for me than 5 minutes
note: this is easily obtainable through Steam Sales or an ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ friend (Do the latter, trust me when I say I didn’t and highly regret it)
2) …and that’s all.
There are 2 ways to write a joke review for Bad Rats. The first one is simple, just talk about another game but don’t let your audience in on the fact that you’re obviously talking about another game. Tell them how much you liked the Open World aspects and how the gunplay is good, while also talking about how the Dragon slaying was immensly enjoyable. That’s just one example.
You could also praise it like it’s the game by saying things about it that are obviously true. Praise it’s innovative features, such as broken physics the super-realistic physics engine, the racist rat culturally diverse rats, the terrible graphics strikingly realistic visuals, and who could forget music so bad it will make your ears bleed the soundtrack that rivals even the likes of classics like Super Mario Brothers, The Very Hungry Catepillar bonus dvd (thnx for buying our book), The Blair Witch Project, and even The Good The Bad And The Ugly.
Talk about the fact that you and your friend are no longer friends. It’s easy. Just say something like “my friend gave me this, now no one can find him and there’s a nation-wide manhunt going on”.
E.Z.
Making a real review
Play the game and accuratley describe it. It really isn’t that hard.
Writing a guide about How to write a review for Bad Rats
In order to share this wisdom, go on any forum, any site, etc. and tell them about the game’s reputation while using edgy and absurdist humor that isn’t very funny and is obviously trying very hard to be funny because the person who wrote it is obviously still hitting their growth spurts who acknowledges the fact that they’re not silly with their edgy and absurdist humor that isn’t very funny and is obviously trying very hard to be funny because the person who wrote it is obviously still hitting their growth spurts. Also, link to old 70s’ songs that aren’t relevant (but you like) because old music is cool… but don’t forget to always state you like newer music after that because if you don’t the internet will naturally assume you only like old music and will proceed to mock you on sites like Reddit. Also, don’t forget to comment something very edgy like: “but don’t forget to always state you like newer music after that because if you don’t the internet will naturally assume you only like old music and will proceed to mock you on sites like Reddit.” afterwards because commentary is cool, right guys? RIGHT GUYS? RIGHT GUYS?
RIGHT…
Also don’t forget to mock yourself allot.
Allot.
I mean allotallotallotallot…
allotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallotallot.
Am I done with this glorified ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ yet?
Yes?
Oh, thank god.
I can’t wait to tell you guys about how to accuratley play this gam-
wait, is this Bad Rats?
Ah, ♥♥♥♥.