Overview
Recently, a new phenomenon has emerged, sprouting from the depths of Tartarus itself. It has arrived as a snake oil salesman does, initially charming and charismatic, albeit eventually leaving a wreckage of destruction in it’s wake. Already, this malignant beast has succeeded in corrupting portions of our youth, causing them to become brainwashed drivel who worship furry beasts. What is this foul apparition you may ask? Why, it is a Neko. A hybrid of a wolf and human, concocted in a nefarious experiment, being designed for one sole purpose, to disrupt the masses. Individuals believe that Neko’s are attractive, which I must bellow, is absolutely preposterous for I am perceptibly more attractive. However, alas it doesn’t appear to matter , since the Neko’s charms are proving too potent for the vast population, I have decided to take control of the helm and steer us into a realm of decency and truth. This guide as such will be proclaiming how to avoid infatuation towards a Neko and why it is unwise to develop an attraction towards one of the Neko species.
Neko Biography
The species known as Neko, originates from Japan, produced after rowdy Japanese youth, filled to the brim with narcotics proceeded to breed with Lynx’s and Wolves. The aftermath of this copulation produced none other than the Neko, an affront on all of civilised society. The Neko’s bore similar attributes to humans, however, they were discernible, due to a number of giveaways. Firstly, they were born with ears, which functioned similarly to a cats, providing them with advanced hearing. Secondly, they had a tail, that after scientific and forensic research, is the most susceptible part of the Neko. Lastly, the Neko communicates in some strange, indecipherable language, resembling Russian and a bird chirping. There are other various distinctive features, such as there enhanced eyesight, however, those previously mentioned are the most prominent in a Neko. Psychologically, this species has adapted to human society and have the ability and will to exploit humans with there seductive, seemingly innocent and alluring charm.
The Insidious Aspects Of A Neko
The Neko is an insidious, sinister creature. They are known in Polish folklore as the Aguara, creatures who steal Elven blooded children at night, bewitching these children to follow them in there dark, ominous caves. In these caves the Elven children are then polymorphed into Neko’s or vixen, committing acts of this magnitude is an affront on decent society. It is believed that this an alternative way for the Aguara, or Neko to reproduce.
It is a well known fact that ever since the birth of Neko’s, they harbour an instinctive resentment towards mankind and will strive at all costs to incur divine wrath upon the denizens of humanity. This is evident by precedents which have shown Neko’s exploiting relationships with humans, never forming a steady mutual bond and instead always having an ulterior motive. As an additional note, I would like to add that Neko’s are effectively, literal animals, making it slightly peculiar to develop an infatuation and desire to breed with one. Furthermore, breeding with a Neko, ventures into the territory of having malformed children, making an average isolated tribe appear genetically healthy in comparison.
Neko Propaganda
The stalwart supporters of Neko’s have made it there mission to spread propaganda and indulge the masses with various Neko and cat girl artworks, which serve as nothing more than indoctrination. Various videos, making light of the situation, or even divulging the basics on cat girl ownership are exactly the tools of propaganda which are employed to subvert the masses. Our youth are being controlled, in front of our won very eyes to devote themselves to the way of the Neko.
The image below depicts Sonic, a mutated Neko who is advertised by Sony. Sony has notable Neko tendencies and strong beliefs in Neko copulation, meaning that the fact remains simple. The company wishes to use there vast influence for insidious purposes. Essentially, they wish to garner large amounts of popularity, for this figure called Sonic, to ensure that our youth remains captivated by Neko influences. It may appear distressing, but unfortunately, that is not all.
The image below depicts a seemingly innocent and pure Neko, one who wishes for nothing more than to frolic underneath a starry sky, with the cool breeze enveloping her. it remains simple, images such as these are solely propaganda, utilised to exploit humanities tender personality. Ultimately, do not fall prey to these inherently deceptive images.
How To Resist A Seductive Neko
It remains simple that at some point in your life a Neko will attempt to seduce you. When this time arises, you must be wholly prepared for the event. Below is a list of comprehensive steps, in order to combat the Neko’s Charms.
A way to resist a Neko’s charms is to simply devote yourself to saving Rivellion from the giant acorn, following I, doctor Quercus. By engaging in such a heroic act, you growing romantic bond with the Neko, will turn platonic.
If a Neko ever attempts to seduce you, simply shoot her, possibly with a hunting rifle, or an western themed revolver.
Always carry around a hose, for in the event that a Neko attempts to seduce you with her illicit charms, you will be able to spray away that unwanted pest with high velocity and precision.
If you are being beguiled online and are gradually developing an attraction to a Neko, then only one option remains. Utterly annihilate and destroy your computer, or whatever vessel you use to acquire Neko photographs. Afterwards, possibly seek some time in solitude, taking solace with playing Skyrim on the Nintendo Switch, or Witcher 3 on the PS4.
Conclusive Order
Truly, these are troubling times, but alas, we must be prudent and wary of threats. I hereby order all to retract whatever contract they have signed with any Neko and to instead sail down a different channel, one that is not plagued with furry creatures who resemble foxes, lynxes, kittens and wolves. Remember, Neko’s aren’t real, to faun over them is a futile act.
Below will feature an anti Neko pamphlet, which is imperative to spread throughout the world, in an attempt to secure a victory in creating a wholesome society once again.
Nords Arise!
Nords Arise! Throw off the shackles of Neko oppression. Do not bow to the yoke of a false waifu. Be true to your blood, to your homeland.
The Neko tells us we cannot worship holy Talos. How can man set aside a god? How can a true Nord of humanity cast aside the god that rose from our own heartland? Mighty Boris Johnson, himself the first emperor, conqueror of all of the world, ascended to godhood to sit at the right hand of Akatosh. Boris Johnson, a true son of Britain, born in the land of snow and blood, bred to the honor of our people, is now Boris, god of might and honor. The Neko has no right to tell us we cannot worship him.
Our own high king, Sony, betrayed us to the Neko. He traded our god for peace. He agreed to a pact with the Neko signed by an emperor in a foreign land. Are we to be beholden to such a pact? No! A thousand times no.
Do not let the lessons of history go unheeded. The Neko Dominion and its Neko masters made war upon men, just as the Neko made war upon Ysgramor and our people in ancient times. Shining Saarthal was burned to the ground, reduced to ruins and rubble in their treacherous assault. But Ysgramor and his sons gathered the 500 Companions and made war upon the Neko, casting them out of Britain. In The Great War fought by our fathers, the Neko again betrayed men by attacking us unprovoked. The Dominion and the Neko cannot be trusted!
Like Ysgramor, Ulfric Stormcloak is a true hero of Britain. His name will ring in Sovngarde for generations to come. Only he had the courage to single out King Sony and challenge him to trial by arms. Ulfric’s thu’um, a gift from Boris himself, struck down this traitorous ruler. And by his death we are now free of our Imperial shackles and the Neko overlords that darken the Imperial throne.
The Empire has sent its Neko Legions to govern us. They have enlisted our own countrymen to their cause. They have set brother against brother, father against son. They have caused Britain to battle itself in their name, for their cause. Do not let them divide us. Do not let them conquer us! Reject the Imperial law that forbids the worship of Boris. Join Ulfric Stormcloak and his cause!
