Overview
Wanna escape prison the most legal way possible? Want to avoid making enemies and not piss off the guards? Then follow the good noodle guide!
That Lovely Prison Dosh
How do you get money you ask? Metalshop work! Sadly, you need 70 INT to work at metalshop. Once you hit 70 INT you can let it drop but for this guide I suggest you keep hitting the books (not literally as your strength will be nothing through this guide.) During your free periods go to the library and raise your INT
– Reading
– +INT
Once you hit 70 INT, head over to the job center and apply for Metalshop. After you will recieve a letter of approval and the screen should look like this.
– Note your character name will be there not Monkey Two
After getting it wait for the work shift and head out into the yard. The metal shop is the most southern building a bit to the west. Once there you will have a simple $60 per session.
– This is the building
– Take six sheets from the metal box
– Press them at the machine (this is useful as you can instantly get them done)
– Putting six plates in the plate box will almost half fill the meter. The job takes 14 total plates
– You are now $60 richer, you lucky dog you, don’t spend it all in one pl- Oh right… Sorry.
As this job is extremely quick it will give you time to hit the books or start your escape once you have the capital.
– Or again seriously keep at the books
Making Friends. In prison. Prison friends. Who won’t shank you. Hooah.
Now we get to the “Good” portion of the Good Noodle Guide. Making buddies or at the least not enemies. For one it’s rude to look at others in the showers, always look away. Not going to put a picture for that one. But here are the basics:
- Do “good” jobs
- Give them your contraband
- Avoid throwing any punchs and run from combat
Do “good” jobs
By this I mean avoid anything that involves guards or fighting. The jobs you want involve getting things.
– Avoid these, they involve guards. Although if they say an inmate name, take it!
– You can do these if you’re hurting for cash but make sure that they are more than $10, which is the highest hospital fine I’ve recieved so far in the game. And trust me, you’ll likely be in the hospital if you do these.
– NEVER EVER EVER DO THESE! even if you could they’re not worth it
THE GOLDEN JOBS
– Sometimes these jobs will have the item on the person (in which case be a bad noodle and hit him, go to the hospital and the guards will knock the guy out so you can loot him) or if it’s in their cell simply pay them a visit (and snatch those dices… or whatever it may be)
In a similar manner any quest that require you to give someone toothpaste or a common item grab as they are easy money. If the item is harder to come by and the price of it is more than the reward don’t take it.
The best place to get jobs are during meals and rollcall as you will all be present
– Example of everyone being there, usually at least two jobs and three vendors will appear during these times
Give them your contraband
Contraband, besides files, are not your friend. Nasty business with the metal detectors and all. But if you pass them to other inmates, expect a little higher opinion of you. Try to give items to the inmate with the lowest opinion rate to boost it. Picture images to follow.
– Item in question
– Person in question
– Item in question to person in question
– Slight opinion boost (at least your arse is safe now)
Questions?
In addition if someone keeps beating you up, pick up razor blades for cheap. They are not contraband and will still give an opinion boost. On occasion, you might find these in other cell’s desks. Always grab them.
Avoid throwing any punches and run from combat
This is fairly self explainatory. Avoid fighting task and keep opinion high enough to keep you safe (no names in red text.) If combat still occurs, run or get ready for the hospital but don’t fight back. Guards hate that.
Perks of Being a Good Noddle
Besides everything you mean. In all seriousness, not focusing on strength and excercise *shudder* you can craft almost anything- no anything with your maxed out knowledge. So hope you’ve been hitting the books.
What to do with all this money? Spend them on every Crafting Note you see. Look through desk and the environment as well. The vents have notes as well, which makes it an ideal escape plan *hint hint save for files as well*
The truth is notes are fairly cheap but their recipes require a lot of brains
– $25-27 average
– Wow this is useful… oh that’s a lot of INT good thing I’ve been keeping up on my- To the library fast!
Even if you don’t use the items you get, it’s good to have back-up plans and the ability to quickly make an item in an emergency.
The Escape-Plan
Not sure why you’d want to but okay if you really don’t like pressing plates and avoiding getting beat every corner by slipping inmates razor blades then listen up… You need lotsa files
Then what? Well you’re going to want escape silly. Oh, you mean how? Well use those files to get into the vents. Want to know more. Well you’ll have to wait a bit as the Escape is coming soon. (Meaning I’ll be making an update once I escape, but hey I got you money and the skills to build things at least :D)
EDIT ONE This very useful comment was posted by Scholar and felt I should tack it on this portion.
Originally posted by Scholar:For the vents, a screwdriver is a MUCH better choice than a file, once in the vent system you’ll need the files tho.
As for your escape, if you consider a hot chocolate cup to the face not too mean, all you need are 3 files, one screwdriver, one(or more) chocolate cups, putty and molten plastic and a sturdy shovel. Along with a few bars of chocolate.Once you have access to the work office using the vents and you have your shovel ready along with the putty, just go to the entrance, wait for a guard to arrive and open one of the red doors and throw a chocolate cup at him, pick the key, copy it, put it back.
Then just save and dig out. You’ll also need two timber braces in total.
PS: In this author’s opinion, a chocolate mug is very “good” and a nice gift to your fellow inmates and/or official “beating master”- I mean guards.