How to git gud at ETG

Overview

So you bought this game and thought: “I’m gonna ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ ace this game!”But look who came crawling to this guide after your 100th defeat in the first chapter.Say no more, fam. I got your back with this guide, which will make your skills skyrocket with 420%.

Step 1

Get a mouse. Dead, alive, doesn’t matter as long as it works.
Now press the right mouse button as shown in the picture. With this awesome technique, you will become invincible and be able to defeat gods.
Oh, you use a controller? ♥♥♥♥ you. Throw that crap away and start using a mouse like a proper man. Now you know how to use your mouse, congratulations.

Step 2

Now you got the basics under the knee, it’s time for some manly stuff. Choose any character and enter the gungeon. Now everytime you encounter an enemy, instead of hiding in your moms basement, use the technique you’ve learnt in step 1. Here is an example how it should go.

Step 3

Look at yourself. Once a coward who couldn’t get past the first chamber, now shining with proud and strength. Here, look more at yourself.

Now do whatever the ♥♥♥♥ you want. You have transcended gods. You rule the gungeon now. Go brag to your friends.

Are you still reading this? I really appreciate it. I just wanna say: