Overview
The most thorough and serious guide on the Community Hub for the bug-proof Insurgency: Sandstorm.
Foreword
I am no man of lot word.
Welcome to Insurgent: Storm
Teamwork Counts
Make sure to use your comms to be toxic. Your anger is meant to be heard over everyone’s headsets. It shares the experience and brings your fellow Terrorists into immersion.
Examples may be: “OHMYF*CKINGGOD THAT HIT HIM,” Or, “You guys are so bad, uninstall.”
What may be the best help, however, is to share a moment before the game begins.
To take a deep breath and stretch out those hammies before the big day.
Commander’s Duties
The majority of the time you hop on your average random queue, you may find the first few words muttered are “IS THERE A COMMANDER? HEY COMMANDER.”
This, for those that do not know, is the proper way to request the commander’s attention. If you are not able to grasp your Big C’s attention, you may have to resort to complaining. This, like the Teamwork Section, brings your friends, coworkers, and the enemies, into a more immersive environment.
The Commander is meant to symbolize the greater good, to push your troops forward even when they want to keel over and die.
That is why the commander has his own personal slave, the Observer.
The Observer does the Commanders bidding; Without the Commander, the Observer is lost and confused. Without the Observer, the Commander is lost and confused.
Commanders use Binos to call in reinforcements from God, aka “Station.” Station, as us mortals refer to it, brings in the most immersive and realistic experience of our lifetimes as puny mortals.
For example, take the Minigun Support:
This majestic beast is the master in floating in middair until it gets shot at and explodes. He is fantastic at getting a kill and then spamming the radio chats until his final demise.
Next up, the Mortar Support:
Similar to the Minigun Support, this glorious puff of smoke floats above us heathens. A true symbol of what is yet to come.
Loadouts & Customization
Next, we will be exploring the wide range of customization abilities that Insurgency: Darude Sandstorm has to offer.
There are many options when choosing what you want to play as and what you will use. The most valuable piece of information you need, is that the 3-point armer is incredibly overpowered- therefore, the best thing against bullets.
Skill? Unneeded, as long as you have 3-point armor. Remember that, kids.
Who needs pants? not you. In fact, the less clothes, the more you will be seen. I bet you can’t even tell this insurgent is wearing camouflage jeans.
Closing Statement
Enjoyed? Pay me money, I enjoy money more than likes. Unlike those other ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥, I would never ask for likes. Of course, make sure to like if you agree and to favorite and subscribe and pay my bills and feed my cats and do my homework.
This is a satire piece, calm your nips. The game is fine and it will continue to improve. Pre-order the game if you want to. I don’t care.
