Overview
A guide for every boss and miniboss or boss-like character (basically anyone who I wanted on the list) with info on their moveset their health, and info on them. WARNING: Probably contains spoilers for Painful and Joyful.Update: Now includes most enemies from BDK’s, Pruf’s and Arkantos mod.
Stats explained
HP: Healthpoints, the health of the enemy
MP: Magic Points, determines how often the character can use a magic attack
ATK: Attack, how much damage an enemy can do with physical attacks
DEF: Defence, enemies with higher defence will take less damage from physical attacks
MAT: Magic Attack, how much an enemies magical attacks can do
MDF: Magic Defence, enemies with higher magic defence take less damage from magic attacks
AGI: Agility, determies which person goes first. People with higher agility will go first.
LUK: Luck, determies chances of criticals, and chances of getting status ailments.
Status effects explained
Note: I do know that the wiki has all of these too, mainly just putting this here for convenience.
Poison: -10% Health every turn. Lasts 4-7 turns. Goes away after 100 steps if not in battle.
Blind: -70% Chance to hit a target. Usually doesn’t seem to matter for most melee based
characters. Lasts 3-5 turns. Removed at the end of battle.
Silence: Never seen this one in game, but apparently it seals the ability to use powers and skills. Lasts 3-5 turns. Removed at the end of battle.
Confusion: Can’t move. 50% chance to be removed when hit. Lasts 2-5 turns. Removed at the end of battle.
Sleep: Can’t move. Lowers evasion by 100%. Lasts 1-3 turns. Removed at the end of battle.
Scared: Can’t move. Lowers evasion by 100%. Lasts 1-3 turns. Removed at the end of battle.
Stun: Can’t move. Lasts 1-2 turns. Removed at the end of battle.
Guard: Lasts one turn. Don’t think it does anything. Removed at the end of battle.
Cover: Takes all damage dealt to allies. Lasts 1 turn. Removed at the end of battle.
Rage: Increases critical hit chance by 30%. Lasts 5 turns. Removed at the end of battle.
Hide: Increases evasion by 60%. Lasts 5 turns. Removed at the end of battle.
Counterattack: Deals damage to enemies when attacked. Lasts 3 turns.
Burning: -5% Health every turn. Lasts 1-3 turns. Removed at the end of battle.
Deep Poison: -4% Health every turn. Lasts 1-5 turns.
Wary: Defence -30%. Doesn’t get removed until sleeping.
Crying: -50% chance to ht a target. Lasts 3-5 turns. Removed at the end of battle.
Paralysis: Can’t move. Lasts 1-3 turns. Lowers evasion by 100%. Removed at the end of battle.
Weird: Lowers Attack by 80% and Defence by 70%. Lasts 4-6 turns. Removed at the end of battle.
Bleed: -2% Health every turn. Lasts 2-4 turns. Goes away after 100 steps if not in battle.
Hungover: Lowers hit and evasion chance by 40%. Increases critical chance by 40%. Lasts 2-4 turns. Goes away after 100 steps if not in battle.
Drunk: Lowers hit chance by 30% and evasion by 20% chance. Raises crit chance by 70%, Attack by 40%, Magic Attack by 40%, and Defence by 30%. Lasts 4-5 turns. Goes away after 100 steps if not in battle.
Stink: Raises evasion by 10%. Lasts 1-3 turns. Some armours also permanently apply it to a party member.
Pissed: Lowers hit chance by 60%. Raises critical chance by 50%. May also attack allies or themselves, and you have no control over a pissed party member. Lasts 2-4 turns. Removed at the end of battle.
Taunt: Raises Target Rate by 1000%. Removed after taking 40% damage.
Withdrawal: Lowers all stats by a lot. Lasts 20-30 turns.
Joyed: Raises hit chance 80%, Critical Chance by 100%, and Defence and Magic Defence by 200%. Lasts 6-10 turns.
Fallen: Can’t move. Lowers evasion by 100%. Lasts 1 turn. Removed at the end of battle.
Cool: Restores 3% HP per turn. Lasts 3-8 turns. Also can be applied permanently by some clothing. Removed at the end of battle.
Super Cool: Restores 6% HP and 3% SP every turn. Lasts 4-8 turns. Removed at the end of battle.
Extorted: Drops double mags on death.
Oiled Up: Takes 250% more fire damage. Lasts 1-6 turns. Removed at the end of battle.
Party Mode: Attack, Magic Attack, Agility and Luck raised by 110%. Lasts 1-8 turns. Removed at the end of battle.
Depression: Lowers Attack by 80%, and Defence and Agility by 70%. Removed by sleeping, excluding Fardy Hernandez and Ollie Nickels who have it permanently.
Kat Gone: Only for Yazan Barghouti. Disables Kat skills. Lasts 3 turns. Removed at the end of batlte.
Critter Gone: Only for Beastborn. Disables Critter skills. Lasts 3 turns. Removed at the end of battle.
Dead: Dies.
Flustered: Can’t move. Lasts 1-3 turns. (Joyful only)
Tired: Lowers hit chance and evasion by 40%. Raises crit chance by 40%. Removed after walking 200 steps. (Joyful only)
Empowered: Raises Attack by 110% Lasts 2-3 turns. Removed at the end of battle (Joyful only)
Arkantos/Pruf’s/BDK’s mods added Status effects
Time Stuck: Can’t move. Lasts 1-2 turns. Removed at the end of battle
No Kidneys: Lowers Defence by 10%. Unremovable.
Traumatised: Target Rate -2%. Unremovable.
Good Aim: Hit chance raised by 50% and Critical chance by 30%. Lasts 2-3 turns.
Uncomfortable: Removes 4% SP every turn. Lasts 3-4 turns. Removed at the end of battle.
Mad: Same thing as pissed.
On Guard: Raises Defence by 120%, Attack and Agility by 110%, and target rate by 1%. Also a pretty small chance that to counterattack. Lasts 1-2 turns. Removed at the end of battle.
Saintly: Regenerates 30% Health every turn. Removed at the end of battle.
Adrenaline: Regenerates 5% health every turn, increases Defence by 120%, Attack by 110%, Agility by 200%, and Critical chance by 20%. Small chance to counterattack. Lasts 4 turns.
Protected: Raises Defence by 300%. Lasts 1 turn. Removed at the end of battle.
Chilled: Raises Defence by 30%. Removes Wary. Lasts 1-3 turns. Removed at the end of battle.
Shocked: Can’t move. Lasts 1-2 turns. Removed at the end of battle.
Jelly: Raises Agility by 1%. Lasts 1-2 turns. Removed at the end of battle.
Punkert (Optional)
Punkert is the first Joy mutant in the game and can be difficult early on. He shows up after seeing Buzzo for the first time. He can do a lot of damage but only has 700 HP. Behind him is a trash bag shawl.
Not entirely sure, but I think his battle them is Soft Skin.
Moveset
Note: All Joy mutants will have the same moveset unless said otherwise
Bite
Move that Punkert will use a lot for his main attack, can possibly do a lot of damage if you’re low level.
Blood Cough
Pretty much wasting a turn, and does 40-50 damage to himself
Glare
Doesn’t do damage, stares at a party member and inflicts Weirdness on them. All things considered basically wasting a turn
Scratch
Almost the same thing as bite, uses it less often though
Cry
Another way to waste a turn, gives himself crying which lowers his attack by 50%
Yell
Doesn’t cause damage, targets all party members and can cause Scared, which they cannot act for a few turns
Taste
Doesn’t do damage, Punkert licks a member which can cause them to become pissed, wary, scared or all of them
Fatal Chomp
Instantly KO’s and permanently kills a party member. He’s extremely unlikely to use it so I wouldn’t worry about it
Oak Tree Steve and others (Optional)
Desipte being optional you are gonna fight these guys. They are required to be killed to enter Rando’s Turf area, which isn’t required but you should probably go there anyway. The reason being that there are firebombs there which are extremely useful against the Road Scholars and Charmy. These guys are easy but can be tough if you fight them really early on. Oak Tree Steve has 1000 HP, Porky Roy and Lance Gravys have 300 HP, and Mystic Pete and Hoops Jardeen have 200 HP.
Their battle theme is Rando March.
Note: Oak Tree Steve can be fought seperately if you say “♥♥♥♥ you” to the four guys
Moveset
Punch
Oak Tree Steve
Pretty average. It’s a punch. What else is there to say?
Firebomb
Oak Tree Steve
A pretty dangeous attack. Throws a firebomb causing damage to all party members. Chances are he won’t use it though.
Rage Build!
Oak Tree Steve, Hoops Jardeen
Doesn’t do damage, gives the user Rage status effect which gives 30% more chance of critical hits
Big Swing
Oak Tree Steve, Porky Roy
A pretty annoying attack. Like a regular attack except damages all party members
Seriously?
Oak Tree Steve
Steve uses this quite often. Gives the user confusion status effect.
Pump Up
Oak Tree Steve
Basically the same as the Rage Build! attack.
Kick
Hoops Jardeen
It’s a kick
Slice
Lance Gravys
Lance usues his spear glaive thing to attack. Can cause bleeding. Only attack Lance has.
Club Strike
Porky Roy
Pretty much big swing except only hits one target
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Charmy
Charmy is one of the first bosses and’ll probably be pretty tough to fight early on. The old dude will tell you to bring firebombs which can be pretty useful in the fight. I’d recommend having a full team of party members, and Olan is pretty good member to have for this because of his vantage point and poison arrow if they’re unlocked at the time. He has 7000 HP so he may take a bit to kill for an early game party.
Not entirely sure, but I think his battle theme is Soft Skin
Moveset
Charmy has the same moveset as Punkert, so I’m not gonna bother writing a chart for him
The Road Scholars (Optional)
The Road Scholars are a particularly difficult gang you can encounter when leaving Factory Town for the first time. The fight is optional and can be avoided if you give them all of your mags. If you have less than 10 mags the fight will start regardless. Remember when that dude told you that hairspray is extremely flammable? Yeah these guys are why. They have a weakness to fire and will go down after about four, or two is probably enough to weaken them a lot. If you don’t want to use firebombs, then attack Bernie first, because he can cause stunning, then Harley because he has the least health, then Louie, Crack, then Toby. Toby is basically confused the whole fight so you don’t need to worry about him.
Crack is the strongest member with 5000 HP, then Louie with 4300 HP, Toby has 3000 HP (Though he hardly attacks), Bernie with 2000 HP, and Harley is the weakest with 1400 HP.
Their battle theme is Steel Mill.
Moveset
Piledriver
Crack Ripper, Louie Headliner
Can do some decent damage and has 50% chance of causing paralysis. Louie’s only move.
Cross Chop
Crack Ripper
A pretty powerful move only used by Crack, he doesn’t use very often though
Chop
Crack Ripper
Basically ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ version of a cross chop. Can still do something though.
Block
Crack Ripper
A move that reduces damage taken by 50%. Can only target himself. Basically the same as using “Guard”
Club Strike
Toby Cream, Bernie Mantee
Toby and Bernie’s default attack. Toby does much less damage than Bernie does though when he attacks. Has a chance to stun a party member, which is pretty annoying.
Kick
Bernie Mantee, Harley Denim
Harley’s main attack. Pretty average attack for the most part.
Hook Kick
Harley Denim
A more powerful version of kick. Pretty much it.
Sweep
Harley Denim
An attack that does some damage. Main thing is that it can make a party member fall over.
Lost in thought
Toby Cream
Causes confusion on himself. Confusion lasts 2-5 turns and has 50% chance of being removed when hit. Just leave him alone while he’s out and he’s out pretty much 90% of the time.
Taste
Toby Cream
Can cause pissed, wariness and scared. He’ll probably never use it since he’s confused half the time though.
Neck Break
Crack Ripper
Another Perma-kill move. Extremely unlikely to be used but if the battle goes on for a long ass time he could use it.
Men’s Hair Club Presidents
Probably my favourite boss. The Hair counts as a seperate enemy from the Presidents. If you kill the Hair first the Presidents will get pissed for the rest of the battle, while if you kill the Presidents first the Hair dies immediately. Your choice on who to kill first,really. As I said, killing the President’s first will knock out their Hair immediately, but since the Hair can kill party members in one hit a lot of the time, it may be a good idea to kill them first. The Presidents have 5000 HP, the Hair has 6000 HP.
Their battle theme is Men’s Hair Club
Moveset
Hair Whip
Hair
Hair’s only attack. Can do a ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ of damage, and can possible knock some members out in one hit.
Grin
Hair Club Presidents
Only used when below half health. Doesn’t do anything.
Firebomb
Hair Club Presidents
Used when below 40% health. Damages all party members and can cause burning.
Rage Build!
Hair Club Presidents
Gives the user rage status effect
Hair slick
Hair Club Presidents
Basically wasting a turn
Solid Punch
Hair Club Presidents
Slightly more powerful version of punch.
Stomp
Hair Club Presidents
A little bit more powerful than Solid Punch.
The Blue Rockets (Optional)
The Blue Rockets aren’t people I’d recommend fighting, in fact I’ve never fought these guys. The Blue Rockets have a chance to kidnap a party member in area one if you sleep at a campfire, and they’ll kill your party member if you fight them. The three memebers however, don’t seem very strong, especially if you’re late into area one. Jerry Humphrey, the leader, has 1700 HP, while Dolf Bones and Bark Bronzee have 1000 HP. Assumably, a couple firebombs would bring’em down pretty quickly.
Their battle theme is “Horse Sh!t”
Moveset
Pildriver
Jerry Humphrey
50% chance of paralysis
Cross Chop
Jerry Humphrey
Normal attack, slightly better than Chop.
Chop
Jerry Humphrey
Normal attack.
Dirt Kick
Jerry Humphrey, Dolf Bones
Somehow they kick around dirt in this cave. Causes crying, no damage
Block
Jerry Humphrey, Bark Bronzee
Reduces damage taken by 50% for a few turns
Fireball
Jerry Humphrey
Can do a good amount of damage, can also make someone burn
Punch
Bark Bronzee
While all of these men use their fists, Bark is the only who can punch apparently.
Big Swing
Bark Bronzee
Damages the whole party
Tiger Suplex
Bark Bronzee
One of the more powerful moves, can cause paralysis
Bottle Throw
Dolf Bones
Assumably in a display of ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥, the best Dolf can think of is a bottle.
Rage Build!
Dolf Bones
Gives the user Rage status effect
Eat
Dolf Bones
Let’s Dolf heal. Only uses it when he’s below 50%
Kick
Dolf Bones, Bark Bronzee
And only two of them can kick
Heart Squeeze
Jerry Humphrey
As if killing one wasn’t enough, Jerry can kill again. Luckily he probably won’t use it.
Sweet Tea Rakeem and Vic Cherry
Sweet Tea Rakeem is guarding the door to area 2, and is joined by Vic Cherry in Pain Mode. Both have 9000 HP and the same moveset, and can be a pretty damn challenging fight if you’re not fully healed, which you can heal with the campfire right in front of them, which doesn’t have any random events on it.
Their battle theme is “War Season”
Moveset
JMongolian Chop
Rakeen and Vic’s main attack, which does some damage.
Wizard Poke
An attack that does no damage, but gives the target weird status effect
Big Swing
Attack that damages the whole party
Stomp
Slightly less damage than the Mongolian Chop, just as likely to use it.
Pray
Only used when below 15% health, heals the target
Fireball
Launches a fireball at a single enemy, can make the target burn
Heart Squeeze
A perma-kill move. Extremely unlikely to use it though.
The Red Brothers and Others
Pretty easy fight but could be difficult I guess. Starts almost immediately after crashing your motorcycle, so no save point in front of them. These guys have extremely low health and don’t have much going for them really. Warren and Vernon Red have 1000 HP and Don Skin and Laser Aldino have 500 HP. There’s not really too much to these dudes.
Not sure, but I think their battle theme is Rando March.
Moveset
Punch
Don Skin, Vernon Red, Warren Red
Regular attack, the one used most often next to Stomp
Stomp
Don Skin, Vernon Red, Warren Red
Regular attack, the one used most often next to Punch
Big Swing
Vernon Red, Warren Red
Used somewhat often, damages all party members
Firebomb
Laser Aldino
More powerful than big swing, but he’ll probably die before using it
Kick
Laser Aldino
Laser’s main attack. pretty normal
Neck Break
Warren Red, Vernon Red
Pretty much the only threatening thing here. Can permanently kill a party member. More likely to use it than any other previous enemy, still extremely unlikely though.
Henry Wyatt (Optional)
Henry Wyatt is a hidden boss in Muscle Cave. He’s holding a record that’s required to recurit Bo Wyatt. Henry will attack after the record is taken. He has 10000 HP and generally isn’t that hard to beat.
Pretty sure his battle theme is Soft Skin.
Moveset
Henry has the same moves as the previous Joy mutants. He doesn’t have scratch, however, since his arms aren’t in the battle.
Horrace Finkel
Horrace will attack you with a bulldozer at the end of the bulldozer driving segment. He hardly attacks and only has 10000 HP. Mostly a joke boss fight. He also drops Horraces Hardhat on death, which needs to be taken manually.
His theme is “Super Working Stiff”
Moveset
Cry
Wastes a turn. Causes crying on himself.
Apoligize
Does nothing at all
Confused?
Causes confusion status effect
Stall Out
As if he couldn’t get worse this causes paralysis to himself.
Out of Control!
One of his only attacks that does something. Damages all enemies, and can actually do a bit of damage, however he’ll hardly use this
Exhaust
Causes two party members to cry
Ram
Only other attack that does damage. Can do a bit but he’ll probably only use this once in the whole battle
Dojo Buster/Tiger Man (Optional)
The Dojo Buster is a pretty difficult fight but you get him as a party member if you win. Tiger Man doesn’t have a large moveset but is capable dealing a lot of damage. He is however extremely weak to Animal elemental damage, which only Geese can deal, so he’s recommended for this fight. Birdie’s Oil Spit combined with RT’s Bag Flames or Brad’s Fireball can make him die pretty quickly too. Tiger has 27000 HP.
His battle theme is “Go Home Johnny”
Moveset
Slice
The attack he’ll use almost the whole time. Can deal some pretty big damage so healing items are probably needed
Big Slice
He’ll only use this when he’s under half health, deals damage to the whole party.
Block
Makes him take half damage for a few turns
Glare
Doesn’t do damage, can make a party member feel weird.
Georgy (Optional)
Georgy’s on Garbage Island and has to be fought if you want to recruit Ollie Nickels. Georgy has 12000 HP so he’s not very strong. He’s pretty much the same as the other Joy mutants so far.
His battle theme is Soft Skin
Moveset
Georgy has the same moveset as the other mutants that have been seen, however instead of Fatal Chomp he has Neck Break.
The Doctor (Optional)
The Doctor is a Joy mutant in the Nice Neighborhood area. His full name is Doctor Lemont. He has 14000 HP and other than story significance isn’t that speical.
His battle theme is Soft Skin
Moveset
Doctor has the same moveset as other mutants, however he doesn’t have any permakill moves.
Slave Lord Jim (Optional)
Slave Lord Jim is a strange enemy to say the least. He’s on Dismal Island, and has a small quest line. To activate it, agree to his plan, jump off the cliff, walk back up, change your name to “Sexy Boy”, then talk to him again. Drink his drink he makes then talk to that thing that looks like ET. After that he’ll fight you. He can be somewhat difficult, especially since you just jumped off a cliff for 500 damage. He has 10000 HP and drops the best bow in the game, the Martlo Bow on death.
Also, he is based off of Jim Sterling, who he is voiced by when he dies. Ironically Jim didn’t even like the game that much.
Moveset
Smile
70% chance to blind a party member
Heaven’s Fist
One of the only enemies in Painful to use this, can do a lot of damage.
Pump Up
Jim rants about Konami to get him enraged
Poison Bite
Somehow he can poison you by biting you. Only human enemy that can do this
Dirty Insult
Makes a party member pissed. Basically Verbal Bash that Terry has.
Jonathan (Optional)
Jim Sterling’s escaped slave. Despite looking like a Howard Stern on meth doing a very fun boogie Jonathan is extremely dangerous. Jon has 15000 HP and drops a Crimson Tide SMG on death. His character is also from the Dismal podcast like Jim’s and the mustache dude, Conrad are.
Moveset
Jonathan has the same moveset as other mutants pretty much. However, what makes him dangerous is that he is extremely likely to use Fatal Chomp, a perma-kill move. When you fight him it’s highly likely that you will lose at least one party member.
Lil’ Nuggie
Wally’s weird murderous pet who looks like he’s from Monsters University. He shows up halfway up the mountain to Wally’s. He has 12000 HP and can offer some damage towards the party.
His battle theme is “Love”
Moveset
Eat
Restores around 500 of his own HP. Only uses it when he’s under 20%
Bite
The attack that Nuggie uses the most often. It can do some damage.
Yell
Affects the whole party, can cause scared status effect.
Ramble
Wasting a turn. Does nothing at all.
Taste
Licks a party member. Can cause Pissed, Wary, or Scared
Fatal Chomp
He’s extremely unlikely to use it, but he could.
Wally
Probably one of the more creepy enemies in the game, Wally is an insane restaurant owner who acts as God of a small village. He has three phases, but he’s probably weaker than Lil’ Nuggie. He’s the last boss before area three. Wally has 6000 HP on Phase 1, 8000 HP on Phase 2, and 5000 on Phase 3.
His theme in battle is “My Lord, My Wally”
Moveset
Scratch
All Phases
The main attack that Wally uses.
Grasp
All Phases
A pretty damaging attack. Not used as much as Scratch though.
Laugh
Phase 1 and 2
Targets all members. Has a chance to make them depressed and scared. One of the only attacks in the game that can inflict depression
Grope
Phase 1 and 2
Makes one party member feel weird
Eat
Phase 2 and 3
Heals Wally. Only uses it when he’s under 20% health.
Blood Cough
Phase 3
Wastes a turn and deals 40-50 damage to himself
Neck Break
Phase 3
Perma-kill move. Extremely unlikely to use it though.
Peter Smoove and The Pretty Boys (Optional)
Just like the Blue Rockets, I have never fought Peter, and for the same reason. Same for the Blue Rockets, I’d recommend never fighting this guy unless you just wanna test the fight or something. Peter has 10000 HP himself, while his four nameless Pretty Masks have 4000 HP each. If you do fight them, taking out Peter ASAP would be a good idea. He can do some damage with his pistols. Brad’s Head slide is pretty useful against them.
Their battle theme is “Air Raid”
Moveset
Smile
Peter Smoove, Pretty Masks
Makes a party member blind.
Trash Talk
Peter Smoove
Makes a party member pissed
Shoot
Peter Smoove
Peter’s only damaging attack, can deal some high damage
Wild Strike!
Pretty Masks
Main attack for the Pretty Masks. Can do some damage.
Heaven’s Fist
Pretty Masks
The other attack of the Pretty Maks. Capable of some large damage.
Former Friend (Avoidable)
Only shows up if you gave up Terry to Chris Columbo earlier in the game. Terry renamed himself to Terrible Terry, Lord of Hurtz, and he’s pretty dangerous. Surprisingly, he’s fought seperately from the Gents but the fight with them will start directly after this one, so be prepared. Terry has 10000 Health, and a very large chance to use a perma-kill move.
His battle theme is “Go Home Johnny”
Moveset
Dirty Insult
Basically Terry’s verbal bash skill, makes target pissed.
Chop
Main attack, can do some good damage.
Cry
Inflicts crying on himself
Tackle
Does some damage, can also knock a party member over
Neck Break
The reason not to abandon Terry. He’s as likely to use this as he is Tackle, which is pretty likely. Expect to lose a party member in this fight.
The Gents
The Gents are most of Brad’s childhood bullies, and the fight will start immediately after Terry’s if you had to fight him. All the members can be pretty damaging enemies. Tom Cream has 4000 HP, and Sergei Rage and Larry Sports have 5000 HP. I’d recommend taking out Tom first, he’s the weakest and seems to do the most damage, Sergei then Larry. Larry seems to do the least damage out of all of them. Chances are Larry will spend a good portion of the battle using Ironbody and buffing up.
Their theme is an altered version of Men’s Hair Club
Moveset
Kick
Tom Cream
Tom’s least damaging move. Still capable of some good damage though.
Hook Kick
Tom Cream
A more powerful version of kick
Hook Kick
Tom Cream
A more powerful version of kick
Sweep
Tom Cream
Does some damage, and knocks a party member over.
Big Swing
Sergei Rage
Attacks all party members
Tiger Suplex
Sergei Rage
Sergei’s main attack, can cause paralysis
Knife Hand
Sergei Rage
Does some decent damage, not that bad though.
Cross Chop
Larry Sports
Larry’s most powerful attack
Stiff Arm
Larry Sports
Larry’s most used attack, not as good as Cross Chop but decent
Ironbody
Larry Sports
Gives Larry Ironbody status effect, usually spends a couple turns after buffing up more.
Herb (Pain Mode)
Herb is probably one of the more dangerous enemies in the game. I absolutely hate this dude. Despite him look like a sleeping obese man with a ♥♥♥♥♥♥ up hand he has 17000 HP and can hit like a damn truck.
Moveset
He has the normal mutant moveset, really. He still can do a lot of damage though. He also is pretty likely to use Fatal Chomp.
Buffalo Van ♥♥♥♥ and his team
Buffalo Van ♥♥♥♥ is a warlord and some ex-football player hiding up in the mountains with his team. His team is considerably easier he is. After you defeat him he’ll join your party, and he is a pretty good party member so that’s pretty cool. He has 15000 health while his team all have 2000 HP.
His theme is “War Season”
Moveset
Note: The team has the same moveset mostly. The only difference is that Iroquois Planter and Redd Dillinger can’t use Gator Clamp. Addionally, Buffalo’s moveset isn’t much different so I won’t even bother writing it down because I’m a lazy ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥. Only difference he can use Cross Chop, and neck break.
Gator Clamp
Attack they use the most often. Does more damage than Stiff Arm
Stiff Arm
Other attack used the most often. Doesn’t do a whole lot of damage.
Bottle Throw
They don’t use it very often, doesn’t do a whole lot of damage either.
Dirt Kick
Don’t know how they kick dirt around on a snowy mountain, causes crying.
Peter (Optional)
A Joy mutant on the same mountain as Buff. Essentially just a more dangerous Herb but with less HP. If you fight him, don’t expect to come out with a full party.
Moveset
As usual, he has the regular Joy mutant set, however, he has two perma-kill moves, making him twice as likely to use them, and he’s likely to use both already. If you fight him you are more than lilely going to lose someone.
Spoony “Sidewalk” Vee
Sidewalk is probably one of the more dangerous human enemies in the game. He has a huge moveset, a perma-kill move which he’s likely to use, and 10000 HP. Despite this he takes 300% more fire damage, combined with Birdie’s Oil Spit and that’s 550% more fire damage he can take. If you use fire damage he’ll die extremely fast.
Moveset
Gator Clamp
One of Spoony’s main attacks.
Mongolian Chop
His other main, capable of some bad damage.
Tiger Suplex
Good damage, causes paralysis
Big Swing
Pretty dangerous, damages the whole party.
Rage Build! and Pump Up
Essentially the same things, cause Rage status effect.
Block
Raises defence for a few turns
Fireball
Pretty damaging, can cause burning.
Neck Break
Perma-kill, he’s kinda likely to use it but will probably die before he can.
Beady (Optional)
Beady is one of the more powerful mutants in the game. He has 20000 HP and pretty high attack. He’s guarding the keys to The Devil’s Machine, which are required to fight Satan.
Moveset
He has the same moveset as other mutants, however WILL use fatal chomp in the battle. Expect to lose someone fighting this guy.
Han Tsunami and The Devil’s Bath Boys
Probably the biggest fight in Painful. Han is the strongest member with 14000 HP, Huey Fujiwara has 4000 HP, Ned Tanaka, Herman Masatoshi, and Ernie Shozo have 3000 HP, and Yo Hosei and Marco Hitoshi have 2000 HP. Brad’s Headslide or Homerun Headslide are extremely effective here, and firebombs can do massive damage to them. Fire based attacks are recommended here.
Their battle theme is “Devil’s Bath Boys”
Moveset
Tsunami Driver
Han Tsunami
An attack only used by Han Tsunami, and does a lot of damage to one target.
Cross Chop
Han Tsunami
A decently powerful attack
Peer
Han Tsunami
A move that raises the power of the next attack.
Big Swing
Everyone but Han Tsunami
Damages all party members
Gator Clamp
Everyone but Han Tsunami
Kinda like Big Swing, except it only targets one member.
Mongolian Chop
Everyone but Han Tsunami
More powerful than Gator Clamp.
Sweep
Yo Hosei, Marco Hitoshi
Can knock a member over.
Poison Mist
Yo Hosei, Marco Hitoshi
No immediate damage, poisons target
Knife Hand
Ernie Shozo, Herman Masatoshi
More powerful than the Mongolian Chop
Tiger Suplex
Everyone but Han Tsunami
50% Chance of causing Paralysis
Hook Kick
Huey Fujiwara, Ned Tanaka
Slightly more powerful than the other moves.
Bloodiest Wolf
Bloodiest Wolf is probably the coolest boss in Painful in my opinion. He has 20000 HP and some moves that can potentially ♥♥♥♥ you up pretty bad. He’s pretty much a stronger version of the guys before him.
His theme is an altered version of “Men’s Hair Club”
Moveset
Deer Horn
Unique to Wolf, no damage but 100% chance of paralysis.
Peer
Makes his next attack stronger
Heaven’s Fist
One of the few enemies to use this, does a huge amount of damage.
Howling Gyser
Does a lot of damage, and deals it to the whole party.
Fireball
Not as damaging, but can cause burning.
Heart Squeeze
Perma-kill move. Chances are he won’t use it though.
Blue (Optional)
Blue, a member of the now dead Salvation Rangers isn’t that hard of a fight. He has 10000 HP and less moves than most mutants. Killing him lets you grab Black’s Helmet.
Moveset
Blue has the regular moveset for the most part, except he only has Blood Cough, Scratch, Cry, and Break Neck. Bite is assumably not there because he has a helmet on.
Hawk Hollywood
Definitely my favourite boss in Painful. Hawk has 19000 HP and has some pretty damaging moves. It’s probably a good idea to bring someone who can inflict poison, burning, or anything else that does damage over time to counter his “Super Cool” status.
His battle theme is “Die! Die! Die!”
Moveset
Wild Strike!
A pretty normal attack.
Smile
No damage, can make someone blind though.
Woo!
Inflicts Super Cool status effect on himself. This gives a lot of health over time.
Hollywood Hustle
A much more powerful version of Wild Strike!
Fatal Chomp
Perma-kill move. He may use it. Be wary of this.
Neck Brea
Perma-kill move. As if one wasn’t enough.
Hawk (Pain mode)
If you’re on pain mode you’ll get a more powerful and slightly terrifying version of Hawk. This version has 20000 HP and is way more likely to use a perma-kill move.
Moveset
Since he’s a Joy mutant, he has the same movesets all of them have. He did, however, keep the Smile attack from the normal version.
Rex Thunderstorm (Optional)
Another enemy I wouldn’t recommend fighting unless you really have to. You’ll have to fight Rex if your party member gets kidnapped in area three, sadly by the time you get there your party member will have been absolutely destroyed along with the rest of the biker gang. I have actually fought him myself unlike the other guys who do this, he isn’t that difficult and drops a motorbike helmet, which is the best in the game. He has 14000 HP.
Moveset
Rex has the regular mutant moveset, excluding Bite because of his helmet, and Sratch is replaced by Bike Slam. He’s also more likely to use Neck Break.
Satan (Optional)
Satan is the hardest enemy in the whole game. He has 80000 HP and WILL use a perma-kill move. There are a lot of strategies you can watch to beating him, most involve characters like Birdie, Fly, RT, etc. Killing gives Satan’s Belt Buckle, the best accessory.
His battle theme is “Exploding Hearts”
[h1Moveset][/h1]
Power Bomb
Probably Satan’s least damaging attack, still does a lot though.
Destiny Poke
Does 0 damage, however it can cause the target to Bleed, become Depressed, Scared or Cry.
Piledriver
A more powerful Power Bomb. Caues paralysis.
Heaven’s Fist
Another extremely powerful attack.
Decapitate
Perma-kill unique to Satan. He likes using it a lot.
Final boss of Painful
The fight with Rando is long and hard, but virtually impossible to lose. Apparently on death he drops a karate belt but you can’t use it, so that’s cool I guess. Has three phases.
His battle theme is “The End Is Nigh”
Moveset
Attack
Phase(s)
Description
Rando Bomb
All phases
Pretty damaging compared to his other attacks.
Rando Stab
All phases
Does slightly less damage than the Rando Bomb.
Rando Buster
Phases 1 and 2
The same as Brad’s Buster Punches.
Fireball
All phases
Can cause burning.
Cry
Phases 2 and 3
Gives Rando Crying status effect.
Scratch
Phase 3
Used the most in phase 3.
Blood Cough
Phase 3
Deals damage to himself.
Start of LISA: The Joyful section
Lenny Luigal’s gang
The first real fight in The Joyful is against the Luigal gang. The health of the members (from left to right in the picture): Tanaka Mendez (800HP), Wade Bryant (600HP), Ernie Fouller (500 HP), Lenny Luigal (40HP), Paul Sweesey (900HP), Carry Dancer (700HP), Frank Caldwaller (600HP). It’s probably a good idea to kill Paul first, since he does the most damage, then Carry and Tanaka, and Lenny last, since he can’t do any damage.
Their battle theme is “Creep on Her”
Moveset
Attack
Lenny Luigal
Only thing Lenny has, does no damage.
Slice
Wade Bryant, Paul Sweesey
Main attacks for Paul and Wade.
Big Slice
Wade Bryant, Paul Sweesey
Damages both Rando and Buddy. Paul only uses it when he’s below half health.
Club Strike
Tanaka Mendez, Carry Dancer
Only attack that Tanaka and Carry have. Causes stunned.
Punch
Ernie Fouller, Frank Caldwaller
Main attack for Ernie and Frank.
Stomp
Ernie Fouller, Frank Caldwaller
Not much different from punch.
Gator Clamp
Frank Caldwaller
Most powerful attack for Frank. Still not as good as Paul’s attack.
Gary The Hot Soup
Gary the Hot Soup originally showed up as a wrestle with only 200HP in Painful. Now he shows up as a miniboss with 5000HP in Lardy’s Truck area. He shouldn’t be too hard, but since he’s the last after 3 other consecutive enemies he could be a problem.
His battle them is “666 Killchop Deluxe”
Moveset
Steel Chair
Can do a decent amount of damage. He’s also the only person in Joyful to use this attack.
Bottle Throw
He uses it pretty often, though it does ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥.
Gator Clamp
Pretty much the same as Steel Chair.
Piledriver
Pretty dangerous, does good damage and causes paralysis.
Pump Up
Causes Rage status effect.
Lardy Hernandez
Lardy Hernandez is ranked 4th on the list and is probably the first one the player will fight. Lardy can deal some decent damage, and when he’s on low health he’ll pull out two assault rifles that can hit Buddy or Rando up to nine times each. Lardy has 10000 HP.
His battle theme is “Mouth Wide Open”
Moveset
Mongolian Chop
One of Lardy’s weaker attacks. It can still do a good amount of damage to a low-level Buddy.
Big Swing
Can damage both Buddy and Rando.
Gator Clamp
A bit more powerful than Mongolian Chop
Tackle
Can knock the target over
Stiff Arm
Doesn’t do that much damage compared to the others.
Clip Dump
Only attack that he can use on low health. Can hit a target up to nine times. Also does not have to target one person.
Bobo
Bobo is one of two Joy mutants blocking the path to Vega Land. He’s incredibly easy though. He has 5555 HP and doesn’t attack much. Basically an easier version of Cooper.
His battle theme is “The Big Girl Has Cometh”
Moveset
Bobo has the regular mutant set mostly, he cannot taste or glare however.
Cooper
Cooper is a Joy mutant blocking the path to Vega Land. He has 9000 HP and isn’t necessarily strong. He doesn’t attack much either. He should be pretty easy.
His battle theme is “Creep on Her”
Moveset
Cooper, as a mutant has the good’ol Mutant set. He can’t, however taste and he can heal when he’s below 50% by eating.
Vega Van Dam
Probably my favourite Warlord, Vega Van Dam can deal some real damage, along with his two bodyguards, Timmy Apple Cat, and Fatty Peach Dog. A good strategy I used is to use Flash on Vega while Rando takes care of Fatty and Apple Cat. Vega has 10000 HP, while Fatty Peach Dog has 6000HP, and Timmy Apple Cat has 5000 HP.
His battle theme is “666 Kill Chop Deluxe”
Moveset
Smile
Vega Van Dam
Can blind one target
Wild Strike!
Vega Van Dam
One of Vega’s normal attacks.
Woo!
Vega Van Dam
Gives himself Super Cool status effect
Hollywood Hustle
Vega Van Dam
More powerful version of Wild Strike!
Hair Slick
Vega Van Dam
May have the ability to remove status effects, or that may have been a coincidence when it happened to me.
Big Swing
Fatty Peach Dog, Timmy Apple Cat
Damages Rando and Buddy, attack they use most often
Brain Chop
Fatty Peach Dog, Timmy Apple Cat
Deals decent damage to a single target.
Sweep
Fatty Peach Dog, Timmy Apple Cat
Knocks one target over
Poison Mist
Fatty Peach Dog, Timmy Apple Cat
No initial damage, poisons one target.
Baby
Baby is a mutant in Mr. Beautiful’s town. Despite looking absolutely damn terrifying, he doesn’t really do much. He can be pretty easily defeated and spends most turns idling. He has 7000HP.
His battle theme is “The Big Girl Has Cometh”
Moveset
Since Baby is a mutant he has mostly the same moveset as most mutants. He can’t bite or taste due to his mask, however.
Mr. Beautiful
Mr. Beautiful is a Warlord who’s ranked #5 on the List. He’s probably the easiest out of all of them. He has three phases, and he doesn’t fight back for the first two. He has 2000HP for the first two and 6000HP for the thrid.
His battle theme is “BBB”
Moveset
Stall
He only does this for the first two phases. Basically wastes a turn.
Brain Chop
Despite doing nothing for two phases he attacks quite hard. You should probably take him out as fast as possible.
Cosmic Chop
Variant of the Brain Chop.
Power Bomb
Basically another variant of the other two.
Block
He’ll sometimes do this during the second phase instead of stall. Takes less damage.
Winner Winner What’s Four Dinner Boys (Optional)
The Winner Winner What’s Four Dinner Boys are an optional fight that Buddy can start if she’s goes to them without wearing a mask. The fight is actually pretty difficult, Rando and Buddy might both need to be on Joy to win. All four band members have 5000HP while all Dancers have 2000HP. The Dancers should be taken care of first, because they can deal a lot of damage very fast, Burt next because he can throw firebombs, Jimmy and Larry, and finally Peen because he’s ususally confused.
Moveset
Scratch
Dancers
The main attack that the Dancers use that do a surprisingly large amount of damage.
Grasp
Dancers
Another attack from the Dancers, can also do a surprisingly large amount of damage.
Party Time!
Dancers
80% to send every ally into party mode, which gives +10 every skill.
Taste
Dancers except for Cherry Fleet, Peen Dillie, Burt Tornado
Can cause Wary, Weird or Pissed.
Grope
Dancers except for Cherry Fleet, Peen Dillie, Burt Tornado, Larry Cosmos
Causes Weird.
Familiar Song
All Band Players
Causes Crying
Club Strike
Jimmy Winner
Jimmy’s only damaging attack. Can stun enemies.
Hook Kick
Larry Cosmos
Decently damaging, hardly ever uses it though.
Triple Attack
Larry Cosmos
Attacks target three times, despite that doesn’t do much damage.
Lost in Thought
Peen Dillie
Causes confusion to user. Peen uses it a lot.
Harry (Optional)
Harry’s probably one of the ugliest ♥♥♥♥♥ in the whole game. And he’s tough as hell. He has 99000 HP, which is the most of any mutant. He also drops the Big Blade on death, which is the best weapon in Joyful. He’s required to be killed to get to Green’s House. He usually only attacks three at a time, and spends a lot of time idling so you can heal, and attack him.
Moveset
Now he has a lot of health, but he really isn’t that hard. He has the same Mutant moveset, he will, however, start healing when he’s below 50% health.
Arty (Optional)
Holy mother of ♥♥♥♥ this guy looks terrifying. He has 35000 HP and may take a bit to kill. Despite this, he’s really easy. He’s extremely vulnerable to Flash so just use it over and over again and attack while he’s flustered. He’s required to be killed if you want to get to the Land of Hints.
Moveset
Arty hardly differs from the regular mutant moves, however he can heal himself by eating when he’s below half health.
Dice Mahone
Dice Mahone is a Joy mutant who needs to be killed since is (or was) the third most powerful Warlord in all of Olathe. He can be pretty difficult since he doesn’t spend most turns idling like most other Joy mutants. He has 20000 HP.
His battle theme is “Roll the Dice”
Moveset
He has the same moveset as most mutants. He may waste a turn to think every once and a while though.
Louie
Louie was one of Sindy Gallow’s men turned mutant. Louie isn’t very particularly interesting and only has 7000HP. Not even gonna bother writing a moveset section for him because he has the exact same as other mutants with nothing speical.
Sindy Gallow’s Men
The group of Sindy’s men that betrayed him and killed him for trying to kill the Joy mutants. Dove Jackson has 9000HP, Archie Cartwright has 8000HP, and Juan Peltzer and Woofy Sears have 5000HP. They don’t do much but fire arrows.
Their battle theme is a slowed down version of “Mouth Wide Open”
Moveset
Arrow
All
Only damaging attack they have, can do damage over time.
Taste
Archie Cartwright, Woofy Sears
Causes Wary, Weird, and Pissed
Grope
Archie Cartwright, Woofy Sears
Causes Weid.
Sindy Gallows
Despite being practically dead Sindy Gallows will still fight you. This fight also happens directly after the last one, so no saving or healing imbetween them. Sindy has 20000HP and is probably one of the most badass people in LISA.
His battle theme is “Arrow to the Head”
Moveset
Gator Clamp
One of Sindy’s least damaging attacks, can still deal some damage though.
Mongolian Chop
Another one of his normal attacks, deals similar damage to Gator Clamp.
Poison Mist
Poisons Buddy
Blood Cough
Wastes a turn, deals a little bit of damage to himself.
Fatal Chomp
Not Perma-kill anymore because you only have Buddy, still deals tons of damage though.
Bolo Bugaughtiichi (Optional)
Bolo is the one of the first bad guys you see in the game, though you don’t get to fight him until five Warlords are killed. Choosing to let Rando go will start the fight, while if you hold on tight he’ll get decapitated by a mutant. Bolo has 20000HP and can be a difficult fight if you come unprepared.
His battle theme is “Here Comes Bolo Bugaughtiichi”
Movelist
Mongolian Chop
Bolo’s main attack
Sweep
Knocks you over, he likes to use it too
Hook Kick
A pretty powerful attack, used just as often as the Chop
Triple Attack
Another dangerous one, attacks you three times at once
Big Lincolns Men
Bullet Tom
Bullet Tom is the first and weakest of his men with 5000HP and very little attacks. Should be very easy to kill.
His battle theme is “666 Kill Chop Deluxe”
Moveset
Clip Dump
Unloads a whole clip into you, hits 4-5 times but does very little damage.
Reload
Wastes a turn realoding. Does this often.
Clark Cutter
Clark Cutter is the second member you have to fight. Clark has 8000HP but still should be pretty easy.
His battle theme is “Mouth Wide Open”
Moveset
Slice
Clark does this every turn. Can deal some good damage and cause bleeding.
Big Slice
Clark starts doing this when he’s below half. Does a bit more damage.
Grip Ripper
Grip Ripper is the third enemy on the path to Big Lincoln. Grip can prove to be pretty challenging and has 10000HP.
His battle theme is “Creep on Her”
Moveset
Pilerdriver
Can cause paralysis, which can become a big problem
Ironbody
Gives user Ironbody status effect
Power Bomb
Attack he uses pretty often. Can deal a lot of damage.
Cosmic Chop
Similar to the Power Bomb
Wizard Poke
No damage, makes target feel weird.
Poker Heat Johnson
The final enemy on the path to Big Lincoln, can be pretty tough to beat. He has 12000HP and can deal some pretty large damage.
His battle theme is “Roll the Dice”
Moveset
Slice
Most common move. Can cause bleeding.
Big Slice
Only uses it when HP is below 50%. Can also cause bleeding.
Trash Talk
Uses it a lot. Makes Buddy pissed.
Hook Kick
Johnson’s main attraction. Can deal some pretty large damage.
Big Lincoln
Probably the coolest boss in Joyful, Big Lincoln has 20000HP and can deal some extreme damage. Big Lincoln is the most powerful, and last warlord you need to defeat. He also has three phases. In his second phase he has 20000 with the same moveset, third phase he has 12000HP.
His battle theme is “All American Badass Remastered”
Moveset
Glare
All Phases
Causes Weird
Peer
All Phases
Makes next attack more powerful
Heaven’s Fist
Phases 1 and 2
One of Big Lincoln’s most used moves, does some pretty large damage.
Graveyard Bomb
Phases 1 and 2
Does more damage than Heaven’s Fist. Text is “Big Lincoln sends you to Hell”
Pray
Phase 3
Heals Big Lincoln
Howling Gyser
Phase 3
His main attack in phase 3. Does huge amounts of damage.
Sweetheart
Dr. Yado’s pet mutant thing. Has 90000HP. You don’t actually have to kill it. You just have to survive.
Moveset
Mostly has Joy mutant moveset, except they can do huge amounts of damge. Also has Hand Stab, which is Joyfuls version of Heart Squeeze.
Dr. Yado
Dr. Yado doesn’t do anything for the first half. He’ll then start attacking the second phase, doesn’t do that much though. Has 8000HP First Phase, 20000HP second phase, and will turn into a hallucination with 30000 HP the second phase.
His battle theme is “Brokentooth March”
Moveset
Not gonna bother writing a chart since it’s easier not to for Yado. First phase he’ll use Unsure and Regret, neither of which do anything. Second phase he’ll command his mutants to attack, which do regular mutant things, Hand Stab, and also has Toot, which gives him empowered status effect which raises attack by 110%. Third phase also has regular mutant abilities.
Berny
Final boss of Joyful. He’ll spend most of the time killing himself by eating or hitting himself. He has 165000HP somehow. He won’t take long at all though since he just kills himself.
Possible Arkantos/Prüf’s mod section [WIP]
I may or may not do this. Problem is that it’ll take a long time and it’ll take a while to get exact movesets for the enemies, and unless I figure out how to use RPG maker whatsoever, I can’t get exact health amounts.
edit: I decided to figure RPG Maker out and how to open the decrypted info ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥. It’ll still take a while to make this section since I probably missed some enemies and still need to do some testing on a lot of them though.
Bolo Bugaughtiichi and his gang (Pain Mode)
If you activated Pain Mode at the beginning then Bolo will fight with his gang instead of alone. This fight is actually really hard, since the damage Bolo can do topped on with six other guys is a huge pain in the ass. Alternatively, if you don’t let go then Ludwig O’Malley will save Rando, and you get him back without fighting Bolo. Fighting Bolo may be worth it for the EXP though. Bolo still has 20000 HP, Ludwig O’Malley has 11000 HP, Cory Grant has 10000 HP, Ned Barrymore has 9000 HP, Andrew Hopkins has 8000 HP, and Pete Denver and Alan Burgess both have 7000 HP.
Moveset
Grope
Everyone but Ludwig
Causes weird
Taste
Pete Denver, Ned Barrymore, Ludwig O’Malley, Andrew Hopkins
Causes Weird, Wary or Pissed.
Slice
Andrew Hopkins, Pete Denver
Can cause bleeding
Big Slice
Andrew Hopkins, Pete Denver
Targets all party members, which it’s impossible to have one at this point so that’s a bit pointless.
Stomp
Ned Barrymore
Stomps on you. Nothing special.
Rage Build!
Ned Barrymore
Gives Rage status effect
Trash Talk
Alan Burgess
Can cause Pissed
Poison Mist
Alan Burgess, Bolo Bugaughtiichi
Causes Poison
Dirt Kick
Alan Burgess
Can cause Crying
Mongolian Chop
Alan Burgess, Bolo Bugaughtiichi
Alan’s only direct damaging attack
Big Swing
Ludwig O’Malley
Targets all party membes. Basically useless.
Hook Kick
Ludwig O’Malley, Bolo Bugaughtiichi
Can cause falling
Tiger Suplex
Ludwig O’Malley
Can cause Paralysis.
Knife Hand
Ludwig O’Malley
Less powerful version of the Hand Stab attack
Sweep
Cory Grant, Bolo Bugaughtiichi
Can cause falling
Piledriver
Cory Grant
Cory’s main attack
Ironbody
Cory Grant
Gives Ironbody status effect
Triple Attack
Bolo Bugaughtiichi
Attacks three times. ♥♥♥♥♥ you up.
Big Lincoln’s extra men
Xavier Ferrell and Mark Hewitt
Frankly, I’m not sure if these are Big Lincoln’s men or just some random potheads outside his base. They show up in the enemy rush under Big Lincoln’s guardians though so I guess they are. These two fine lads jump down on top of you near the entrance of the cave, and you fight them before you fight Bullet Tom. They both have 6000 HP but shouldn’t be too much of a challenge.
Moveset
Rage Build!
Xavier Ferrell
Gives the user Rage status effect
Grope
Xavier Ferrell
Gives the target Weird status effect
Stomp
Xavier Ferrell
Does this really need a description anymore
Punch
Xavier Ferrell, Mark Hewitt
I don’t really think this does either at this point
Trash Talk
Mark Hewitt
Makes the target pissed
Taste
Mark Hewitt
Makes the target wary, weird or pissed
Hook Kick
Mark Hewitt
Kick that can make you fall over, a bit annoying.
Alhazred the Dark
This is a pretty unique dude. He doesn’t have many phyiscal attacks but can be a decent challenge. Has some attacks that can inflict some status effects too. He has 9000 HP and shows up just after Clark Cutter.
Moveset
Dark Energy
A new attack added in the Pruf mod. Causes bleeding.
Wizard Poke
Makes the enemy feel weird
Pray
Healing ability. Only uses it when under 50% HP
Hematemesis
Probably one of the more annoying things he can do. Vomits blood on you and can cause falling, Pissed, Wary, Oiled Up, Wary and Blind.
Oswald of the Flames
Probably one of the better names in the whole game, Oswald is pretty tough actually. Though I can’t remember right now, pretty sure he shows up just before Poker Heat Johnson. Oswald, as the name suggests, has mainly fire based attacks, so expect to be burning a lot. He has 12000 HP.
Moveset
Fireball
Seems to be his main attack. Causes burning.
Firebomb
Only when under 50%. Chances are it does less damage than most of his attacks though.
Stomps
He kicks you. cool
Gasoline Douse
Biridie’s oil spit. This thing can really ♥♥♥♥ you up. Gives you Oiled Up (250% more flammable) and makes you blind.
Fireball Mk. II
More powerful fireball.
Arkantos Borderguards
These two dudes are the first people you can fight in the Arkantos mod. I wouldn’t actually recommend fighting them though, even though you’ll lose your ♥♥♥♥ you’ll get a cool thing later in the game for it. Anyway, if you do try to fight them they can be hard sometimes. They actually killed me the first time I played at least. Gavin Skinner has 5500 HP and Jared Bristle has 7000 HP.
Moveset
Club Strike
Gavin Skinner
He hits you with a club. Not particulary exciting.
Rage Build!
Gavin Skinner
Gives Rage status effect
Triple Attack
Gavin Skinner
Attacks three times
Grope
Jared Bristle
Causes Weird
Punch
Jared Bristle
Exciting
Ironbody
Jared Bristle
Gives Ironbody status effect
Cosmic Chop
Jared Bristle
Can do a bit of damage
Stomp
Jared Bristle
Stomps on you
Big Swing
Jared Bristle
Damages all party members if you have any others.
Stall
Jared Bristle
Does nothing.
Big Grape’s many cultists
Big Grape has a ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ of cultists to fight, in fact there are so many it had to be in two groups. These fights can be pretty difficult so I’d recommend bringing some firebombs and healing items. I’ll split the two groups into seperate moveset charts and such.
Group 1
The first group has from left to right: Freddy Salsa (6000 HP), Stephen Jean (9000 HP), Arthur Cox (7000 HP), Pierre Tanner (6000 HP), Jordan Wilson (6000 HP), and Abraham Sears (7000 HP). The first group can be tough possibly, but the second group is a lot harder than they are.
Moveset
Arrow
Everyone with a bow
Shoots an arrow, does damage.
Arrow Volley
Freddy Salsa
Shoots three arrows at once
Aim
Arthur Cox
Raises accuracy and gives Good Aim status effect
Taste
Pierre Tanner, Jordan Wilson, Abraham Sears
Gives Weird
Grope
Pierre Tanner, Jordan Wilson, Abraham Sears
Gives Weird, Wary, or Pissed
Fire Arrow
Pierre Tanner
Causes burning.
Headshot
Jordan Wilson
Does more damage, causes confusion
Sharp Arrow
Abraham Sears
Causes bleeding
Ironbody
Stephen Jean
Givse Ironbody satus effect
Hook Kick
Stephen Jean
Causes falling
Power bomb
Stephen Jean
Causes paralysis
Power bomb
Stephen Jean
Causes paralysis
Punch
Stephen Jean
Does ultra-powerful damge, one hit-perma death have to start from the start of the game. Nah it’s just a ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ punch.
Group 2
Second group of cultists you need to fight. They’re a lot harder than the last group so to say. From left to right: Snake Cardoza (6000 HP), Ezekiel Grove (10000 HP), Rowan Cowell (9000 HP), Bruce Wellington (10000 HP), Jason Hastings (8000 HP), Ronald Sullivan (8000 HP), and Kyle Dreamer (8000 HP)
Poison Arrow
Snake Cardoza
Poisons target
Head Aim
Rowan Cowell
Causes Scared
Mild Arrow
Jason Hastings
More likely to cause poison than poison arrow
Sleep Arrow
Kyle Dreamer
Causes sleep
Taste
Jason Hastings, Kyle Dreamer
Causes Weird, Wary and Pissed
Grope
Jason Hastings, Kyle Dreamer
Causes Weird
Power Bomb
Ezekiel Grove, Bruce Wellington
Causes Paralysis
Hook Kick
Ezekiel Grove
Causes Falling
Rage Build!
Ezekiel Grove
Causes Rage
Scratch
Ezekiel Grove
♥♥♥♥ Punching
Tackle
Ronald Sullivan
I don’t how this big ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ can even do this. Causes falling.
Big Swing
Ronald Sullivan, Bruce Wellington
Targets all party members. If you don’t have any others, then it’s useless
Cosmic Chop
Ronald Sullivan, Bruce Wellington
Pretty damaging for Bruce at least.
Block
Bruce Wellington
Raises Defence.
Big Grape
He’s not terribly difficult. He can do some damage but it probably won’t matter if you have some Joy or Zebra Jerky handy. He does have a lot of HP though, 33000 HP.
Moveset
Being a Joy mutant he does most Joy mutant like things. He does however, have a move that I think is completely unique to him which is Try To Talk, causes Weird, Uncomftorable, Wary, and Scared.
Vengeful Angels Technical
Not so much of a technical and more or less a dude holding a gun in the back of a truck but whatever. Naplam bombs are particularly useful in this fight, since there are five guys and the car, being a car, has a nice weakness to fire. The technical itself has 20000 HP, while Marcello the Meek has 6000 HP, and the rest have 5000 HP.
Moveset
Clip Dump+
Technical, Tyrese Shawn, Willem Carter, Samuel T.G.
Pretty sure this is just an upgraded version of clip dump.
Reload
All
Wastes a turn reloading their gun
Burst Fire Nerfed
Samuel T.G., Willem Carter, Technical
Not really sure what the difference is between regular burst fire, but it only fires once.
Stomp
Tyrese Shawn
Why stomp when you have guns? Tyrese isn’t very smart, I guess.
Shoot
Marcello the Meek
Shoots one target once.
Poison Mist
Marcello the Meek
Only thing Marcello’s useful for. Poison’s one target.
Battle Cry
Tyrese Shawn
Gives the user On Guard status effect.
Dirty Insult
Tyrese Shawn
Makes target pissed.
Pick Up Speed
Technical
Not really sure what it does, if it does anything.
Run Over
Technical
Can do a ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ of damage, can also knock you over.
Gabriel Hardt
Leader of the Vengeful Angels. Pretty average, really. He has a pretty large but normal moveset. He’ll cry and stall until you attack him, so use that to heal or whatever if you need to. He has 20000 HP.
Moveset
Solid Punch
Like a punch, but solid
Power Bomb
A kinda powerful bomb
Battlecry
Gives On Guard status effect
Cry
Gabe cries like a lil ♥♥♥♥♥. gives crying.
Hand Stab
Definitely something to watch out for. Can do a lot of damage.
Oliver The Divine
Oliver is a dude that has some sort of weird cult thing I guess. You only have to fight four guys to get to him as opposed to Big Grape’s 1000 dudes so that’s nice. Oliver also isn’t terribly difficult, really. He has some moves which can do some good damage, but as always if you have healing items it shouldn’t be too bad. He has 30000 HP, which is a bit more than Gabriel. After you kill him his followers will all die too, so that’s pretty cool I guess.
Moveset
Solid Punch
One of the most solid punches
Power Bomb
It’s not actually a bomb, and it’s a decent attack.
Hand Stab
Definitely one of his more dangerous attacks, watch out for this as it does a lot of damage
Big Swing
Damages all party members. If you don’t have anyone else he may as well be pissing on you.
Pray to Saint
I guess he prays to himself? Either way it restores HP.
Lost in Thought
Not really sure why he does this but he does. Basically wastes a turn.
Hook Kick
Causes Falling. As always, a bit annoying.
Rando Exiles
These guys are another two part battle. They’re an optional battle for the most part, but you need to kill them to get the Weird Magazine, which is needed to provoke the ATF in Sanctum.
Group 1
The first group really isn’t that difficult. Some of them can cause some undesirable status effects but really they’re pretty easy. From left to right: William Tsang (7000 HP), Lionel Green (4000 HP), Milton Carrick (6000 HP), Raphael Marion (3000 HP), Mortimer Wells (8000 HP), and Ted Kelsey (5000 HP).
Moveset
Rage Build!
William Tsang
Gives Rage status effect
Big Swing
William Tsang
Targets all party members.
Fireball Mk. II
William Tsang
Can cause burning
Mongolian Chop
William Tsang, Milton Carrick
Milton’s main attack for the most part
Knife Hand
William Tsang
Can do some decent damage, he’ll probably die before using it though.
Firebomb
Mortimer Wells, Lionel Green
Pretty much the only thing Mortimer’s good for. Can cause burning.
Bottle Throw
Mortimer Wells
The thing that Mortimer doe the most. Pretty ♥♥♥♥.
Eat
Mortimer Wells
Heals himself.
Think
Lionel Green
Wastes a turn
Gator Clamp
Ted Kelsey
Really don’t know how he does this in a barrel
Stiff Arm
Ted Kelsey
Pretty ♥♥♥♥, really
Tumbles Down
Ted Kelsey
Things that the barrel bros do. Can cause Falling.
Lost in thought
Ted Kelsey
Wastes a turn. Causes confusion.
Poison Bite
Milton Carrick
Thing that Snakes do. Causes Poison.
Dirty Insult
Milton Carrick
Thing that Snakes don’t do. Causes Pissed.
Arrow
Raphael Marion
Shoots an arrow
Fire Arrow
Raphael Marion
Arrow but firey. Causes burning.
Group 2
While not being as unique as the last group, these guys are more powerful overall. From left to right again: Eric Webber (9000 HP), Dickie Days (5000 HP), Sal Jenkins (4000 HP), Randy Dillon (10000 HP), Derrick Weston (8000 HP), Bartholomew Turner (3000 HP), Erwin Garrison (6000 HP).
Moveset
Punch
Sal Jenkins, Eric Webber, Randy Dillon
Solid Punch
Solid Punch, Derrick Weston
As opposed to a liquid punch.
Dirty Insult
Sal Jenkins, Dickie Days, Erwin Garrison.
Can cause Pissed.
Triple Attack
Derrick Weston
Attacks three times. Can be damaging sometimes.
Big Swing
Eric Webber, Randy Dillon, Dickie Days, Erwin Garrison
Attacks all party members.
Stomp
Eric Webber, Randy Dillon, Dickie Days, Erwin Garrison./td]
[/tr]
Block
Dickie Days, Erwin Garrison
Not really sure why they have this but they do. Increases Defence.
Eat
Erwin Garrison
Restores HP.
Arrow
Bartholomew Turner
Arrows you
Sharp Arrow
Bartholomew Turner
Causes bleeding.
[/table]
Unkel
Unkel is probably my favourite warlord in Arkantos. He’s a strip club owner and is somehow third on the list. Before you fight him you need to fight two of his strippers.
Strippers
More namely, Egzon Gjoka and Sparkle Adams. Both of them have 14000 HP, and have the same moveset. They really shouldn’t be too really. And, really, Unkel may be one of the easiest of the Warlords.
Moveset
Scratch
Move that a lot of strippers have. Scratchs you and makes a cat sound. cool
Taste
Causes Wary, Weird and Pissed
Stomp and Solid Punch
I didn’t even bother to sepertate these two
Party Time!
Same move that Dic.k has in the first game. Causes allies and user to go into party mode.
Unkel
Unkel is a Jamaican strip club owner. He fights with his three dogs, Spot, Stinky and Stanley. Stinkey and Stanley have 6000 HP, Spot has 5000 HP, and Unkel himself has 30000 HP.
Moveset
Fierce Bark
Dogs
Can cause Wary or Scared
Bite and Scratch
Dogs
The damage dealing attacks for dogs
Stall
Stanley
Not really sure why he has this, really. Wastes a turn.
Stink
Stinky
Gives the user Stink status effect.
Solid Punch
Unkel
the most solid of Jamaican punches I suppose
Rage Build!
Unkel
Gives the user Rage status effect
Stiff Arm
Unkel
I think he’s pushing you or something. Pretty ♥♥♥♥ though.
Party Time!
Unkel
Sends user and allies into party mode. Can miss.
President Gregor
Leader of the Arkantos Task Force and 2nd on the List. He looks like a pissed off drug addict though. Despite that he’s actually pretty tough. He has a pretty large moveset and some of the ♥♥♥♥ on it can be pretty powerful, on top of that he has 34000 HP.
Moveset
Firebomb Mk. II
Pretty sure this is just a more powerful firebomb.
Flashbang
Pretty annoying attack you’ve probably experienced by now. Causes Burning, Crying, Fallen, and Blind.
Time Stop
Yeah this guy can stop time apparently. Does exactly what it says.
Cyclone Stab
Pretty sure this is just a bit less powerful version of a hand stab. Causes Bleeding.
Rage Build!
Gives Rage status effect.
Fireball Mk. II
More poweful firebomb.
Neck Break
Not perma-kill, obviously. Does a lot of damage though.
Gator Clamp
makes a cool roaring sound when he does it.
Master Dalton
Master Dalton is actually pretty damn tough. His main thing is that he is completely immune to poison, and flustered. Which are basically the two main things Buddy does. He also has three phases, 25000 HP on the first two and 20000 on the last. He does the most damage during the second phase though.
Moveset
Glare
Phase 1
Causes Weird
Helldriver
Phases 1 and 2
More powerfu Piledriver. Causes Wary, pretty small chance to cause Scared or Fallen
Graveyard Bomb
Phases 1 and 2
Same thing Big Lincoln does. Causes Wary.
Hellfireball
All phases
More powerful fireball. 200% chance to cause burning, and 100% chance to cause Wary. Also can cause Poison
Gather Strength
All phases
Removes Bleeding. Gives Garther Strength status effect
Pump Up
Phase 2
Gives Rage status effect
Hand Stab
Phase 2
Pretty damn powerful attack. can cause bleeding.
Sadball
Phase 3
A sad fireball. Causes Burning and Depression.
Cry
Phase 3
As most Satanic cult leaders do, he cries.
Q&A
Q: Why did you even bother to write this if LISA came out a year ago?
A: Boredom mostly. I know that chances are that a lot of people won’t look at it since the game’s old, but who knows. Either way I wrote all this and I don’t want it to feel pointless.
To-do list
- Add info for Buffalo Van ♥♥♥♥
- Add the battle theme for every fight
- I also may add bosses from the Arkantos mod, however that mod is hard as ♥♥♥♥ and will take me forever to beat.
- If there any spelling errors you can say in the comments if you want. I finished this at 6AM after working 10 hours straight on it.
Changelog
-Added stats and movelist for Buffalo Van ♥♥♥♥
-Started working on Pruf/Arkantos mod info.
