SPACE TRUCKIN

Overview

FOR REAL MENthis guide will teach you how to raise an armada of unstoppable space trucks and get rich quick and how to perform an impromptu c-section on most species of marsupials

intro

now i know all u ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ really enjoy shuttling tourists around in your phallus shapped cockets and shipping 36 tons of viagra to hestia, but there is a better way of making money with questionable efficiency and higher risk FUN. if you follow this guide i assure you you will actually grow some chest hair, make a lot of money, and take over the entire galaxy.

i don’t like the deep purple song

setup

PAY OFF YOUR DEBTS. this is a long trade route so this is gonna screw you over if you have to pay off a mortgage every time you jump

get a freighter like the one to the right. it HAS to be one of these. if you have step 1 completed but don’t have the money for one of these you can try to do the route to make enough money to get one of these

go to an outfitter and do the following

• sell the missile turret and buy a blaster turret
• sell your shield (WE ARE REAL MEN)
• sell the stock fuel cell and buy the one that’s a step down, the nGVF-CC Fuel Cell
• sell the x2200 ion steering and buy the x3200 ion steering so we can tokyo drift
• buy 7 fuel tanks because no shield lol

go to the denebola system and land on its only planet geyser. its the one to the left of sol

the trade route

this is a long route but it pays very well. buy meds in denebola and sell them for food in muhlifain, and then sell the food in denebola. our ship is perfectly outfitted for getting to point a to point b as quickly as possible with it’s scram drive and good turning speed, plus we have enough fuel to not make any stops. shields are replenished when you land and tend to last long enough even if there are a lot of pirates (which there won’t be for now), since you are usually jumping to the next system before they have a chance to do any real damage. save up about 2 million credits and move on to the next step.

FUN TIME

buy another ship. outfit it. make even more money. repeat until you could take on the entire republic navy with just freighters. as you do this you will see more and more pirates, until you literally have pirates in every system. your ships combined blaster fire will block out the sun vaporize anything that comes into range. keep your ships close together and keep on truckin

actual gameplay footage

edit: you have now successfully performed a c-section