how to become god emperor

in this guide, you will learn to follow the golden path and become the god emperor of dune effectively enslaving every human being and gaining control of the known universe! hope you have fun convincing people youre god when in reality youre a tyrant!

(disclaimers:)
you may or may not die to a clone of your best friend, you may or may not lose all genitalia, you may or may not lose the ability to eat, you may or may not gain an allergy to water, you may or may not be a massive phallic shaped entity, you may or may not be depressed for the better half of your existence, you may or not lose the ability to ♥♥♥♥, piss or vomit.

instead of saying something stupid and lame like: "defund the police," say this instead:
"𝓅𝑜𝓁𝒾𝒸𝑒 𝒶𝓇𝑒 𝒾𝓃𝑒𝓋𝒾𝓉𝒶𝒷𝓁𝓎 𝒸𝑜𝓇𝓇𝓊𝓅𝓉𝑒𝒹."

instead of saying this boring and uninteresting thing: "that was a dumb ass question," say this cool sexy thing:
"𝒹𝑜𝓃'𝓉 𝓆𝓊𝑒𝓈𝓉𝒾𝑜𝓃 𝓂𝑒 𝒶𝒷𝑜𝓊𝓉 𝓅𝑜𝓈𝓈𝒾𝒷𝒾𝓁𝒾𝓉𝒾𝑒𝓈."

dont say this, (i know plenty of you say this already): "i dont have any friends," say this really cool thing:
"𝑒𝓃𝑒𝓂𝒾𝑒𝓈 𝓈𝓉𝓇𝑒𝓃𝑔𝓉𝒽𝑒𝓃 𝓎𝑜𝓊, 𝒶𝓁𝓁𝒾𝑒𝓈 𝓌𝑒𝒶𝓀𝑒𝓃."

dont say ♥♥♥♥ like this, (i know this is not true for most of you): "♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ everywhere," say this powerful and moving thing:
"𝓉𝒽𝑒𝓎 𝒶𝓁𝓌𝒶𝓎𝓈 𝓁𝑜𝑜𝓀 𝒻𝑜𝓇 𝑔𝑒𝓃𝒾𝓉𝒶𝓁𝒾𝒶..."

want to say "that was a really stupid comment?" Well, use this instead:
“𝐼𝓉 𝒾𝓈 𝒹𝒾𝒻𝒻𝒾𝒸𝓊𝓁𝓉 𝓉𝑜 𝓁𝒾𝓋𝑒 𝒾𝓃 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝓅𝓇𝑒𝓈𝑒𝓃𝓉, 𝓅𝑜𝒾𝓃𝓉𝓁𝑒𝓈𝓈 𝓉𝑜 𝓁𝒾𝓋𝑒 𝒾𝓃 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝒻𝓊𝓉𝓊𝓇𝑒 𝒶𝓃𝒹 𝒾𝓂𝓅𝑜𝓈𝓈𝒾𝒷𝓁𝑒 𝓉𝑜 𝓁𝒾𝓋𝑒 𝒾𝓃 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝓅𝒶𝓈𝓉.”

instead of saying this thing: "i accidentally impregnated half the neighbourhood again," say this super smart thing:
"𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝒷𝒾𝓇𝓉𝒽𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝒷𝑒𝒹𝓈 𝒶𝓇𝑒 𝓂𝒾𝓃𝑒."

do a ♥♥♥♥ ton of spice, merge with sandtrout, wait 3509 years and you should be good to go!